*Listening to The Barlights – Ticking*
I don’t smoke, but I don’t want to part with an extra 15 pennies for a pint of cider. No thanks, it’s already too dear, Darlin’.
Hows-about we tax the people who wouldn’t notice? I don’t mean the rich. I mean the stupid. The ones who put the apostrophe in aren’t somewhere around are’nt. Or triples up letters for no reason (e.g. nottt). Or have double buggy’s at the age of 14. Or have just bought Drum’n’Bass Volume 1827 despite it sounding EXACTLY the same as Volume 1. Or people that have spoiler on their G reg, 1.0 litre, maroon/rust-coloured Nova.
Think about it. When Gazzza or Dazzza or whatever young ruffian goes to get his new alloys or go faster stripe or gutter-dressed-as-an-exhaust or mammoth rear wing- sorry spoiler- he’s quite clearly not going to be of an IQ to notice a giant tax on it, is he now?
Then maybe add a tax onto his beverage of choice, White Lightning, and bam, we’re stabilising our economy and saving the world while we’re at it. Two worlds actually. The first being well, THE world with them cutting their emissions and whatnot. The second being the world of motorsport. Every time a Nova or Saxo chugs past, a little part of every racing enthusiast dies inside. Trust me.
In what way does your little soapbox need more downforce? In what way is that sheet of tin GIVING you any downforce? Do you know what downforce is? In what way do you think that ACTUALLY looks good? You do realise you look, and sound like a complete tool, right? So many questions, but unfortunately when pressed for an answer, said driver will resort to Neanderthal-like grunts and swings of sticks.
Then we take on D/Gazzza’s girlfriend. Who it has to be said is equally as Neanderthal-like.
Rather than rewarding our Kylie or Chantelle or whatever she’s going by for successfully getting pregnant again, hows about we cut the benefit as every child comes along? Now I’m not advocating that little severe Chinese technique, just that any person with something- anything- between their ears realises that a child is a source of spending money rather than making it. Unless their fit for the circus or something of course.
So that’s my solution. Leave beer and cider out of it. Alas, I’m no Darlin’. But Cheers anyway.