What Have You Done?

*Listening to Fionn Regan – Shadow Of An Empire*

If there is one thing that should be regulated by some sort of higher force, it’s the autobiography. It’s getting a bit of a joke now.

N-Dubz have got one now. Seriously. I don’t mean a fan book or annual like those of your youth. An autobiography. From Street Life To Chart Life. 

Riveting, I’m sure.

They’re in their early twenties, what can they really have done to warrant a book? It’s not like they’ll have much wisdom to pass on. And I say this as a fellow early twenties-er.

According to the BBC, it’s a Number Two Bestseller too, which, reading between the lines and correct me if I’m wrong, means people have actually bought it. Who would have thunk it. You do have to be careful what you say about N-Dubz and the unscrupulous Dappy though, especially via text.

It’s equally nonsensical how he gets away with saying to someone “Your gonna die” as it is them having a book out. If I would have received that text, I would have struggled not reply with either simply replying with “*You’re” or possibly with just a “Yes I am, such is the way of Human existence.”

Back to their literary debut, I can’t say I blame them, respecting them for it is a bit far, I say a bit, I mean about as far from respecting them as I do Joey Barton. If they can make money just by selling basically a personal version of OK! Magazine then well done them. Apparently it comes with pictures too, isn’t that nice. Not like the exact same pictures will be in most google searches of N-Dubz, eh?

They’re not alone, taking a random stab into Amazon will tell that….all 26 years of Fernando Torres’ life has been documented. Brilliant. It probably goes something along the lines of “I played a lot of football; even skipped school for it sometimes; joined Athletico as a kid, dream come true; played for Spain, dream come true etc; moved to Liverpool, another dream come true etc; feet are getting itchy as we’re not actually very good”.

Sorry to ruin it for you. Although then again the last is a long shot, it won’t be that interesting despite its truth.

Obviously many biographies/autos can be very interesting like John Peel’s, Lance Armstrong’s, Cloughy etc but pick any random page on Amazon and I can guarantee you‘ll find a book that is more of a waste of a tree than this season was in League One. Obviously that wasn’t a waste of a tree, just a comparison of waste.

Let’s save the rainforest then, and scrap pointless biographies and autobiographies.

To make things even worse, one thing has just occurred to me. From now on my Amazon Recommendations is going have some of these equally pointless books in it.

Great.

About these ads