Tinkering and Tailoring

What with Sir Paul doing his best Ranieri impression, he’s being courted as not knowing his best eleven and/or picking as per the opposition. The three points collected yesterday has gone some way to vindicating his newest philosophy but has also shown his disdain and no time for sentiment.

And I for am all for it.

Dropping Holt on the face of it ‘took a lot of bottle’. But The Big Man hasnt got off to the bruising, gut-busting best we all know and love. His effort can’t and never will be questioned, but it hasn’t quite happened for him yet, regardless of how vague and unspecific that sounds.

We know what he can produce and so do Messrs Terry and Ivanovic, but the use of CMartin with him plainly hasn’t worked. Arguably, the dropping of CMart was the crudest. But the fact that Holt has “been brilliant for me” as Sir Paul never ceases to tell us, he hasn’t allowed the last two seasons of machine-like prolifacy impact his choice of starting eleven.

Quite simply, there is no place for sentiment in football if you’re to succeed at this game. Lappin has fallen foul of it. Since he’s one of the few remaining from previous reigns, some have a special place in their footballing-heart for him. “He played more in League One than anyone else” they argue. Wonderful as that must have been for him, League One this aint.

Now this is no sleight at The Spanish One, despite my views of the guy. He’s merely my example. The same went for Rusty, he returned gloves-on-hands and we lauded it because a little part of us rememebered him from green-gloved years gone by. We’re fickle and easily won over. Doherty was a chief recipient of this, although thankfully not from us all.

He was here for a good/bad few years and this somehow led people to overlook his patently obvious deficiencies. If he was on a season-long loan and played the way he did for the majority of his ill-fated Norwich career, he would be mentioned in the same breath as Koroma and Leijer.

Worthy would never have dreamed have dropping a player like Holt. Neither would Roeder or Grant. Gunn would have filled in every teamsheet with Holt’s name on it in about July. Lambert knows what we need to do to both restrict the opposition and to impose ourselves.

He also can’t help but put himself well ahead of scores of our previous managers.

Playing the Game

With De Laet doing his best to end his stay at Old Trafford, I had a thought. Maybe, if he toned down his errors, it could be good for us that his lack of assertiveness leads to the odd mistake. A few more, of lesser consequence of course, and his exit from Manchester would be sealed with us primed for accepting him.

Then I realised an error-strewn centre-back is the last thing we need and it is a ridiculous idea. Admittedly, Doc he aint. But something isn’t right in his game and it will need rectifying if he is to realise the potential he appears to have at times.

Equally as ridiculous is the idea put forward by Craig Fleming on Canary Call. Not a place I try to find myself in too often, I hasten to add. The sentiments he offered are not his alone, many a former-pro have uttered the same words in that particular order.

“He’s never played the game.”

Heck, we all know I love a moan but this is absurd.

Halsey had a poor game, we should have had a penalty, they shouldn’t. They missed any road and he can’t give what he doesn’t see. We could have affected the game ourselves had we found that goal scoring touch we’ve had at hand the past couple of seasons. Halsey didn’t stop us scoring. We couldn’t hit the target or get on the end of the plethora of inviting crosses.

But the fact he has “never played the game” doesn’t stop him doing his job. It’s an elitist point of view players have. If retired players who have “played the game” become referees they would be older than most referees currently in the game. Then they’d be saying they’re too old and can’t keep up with play.

Or they’d have ingrained dislike for certain teams, managers and players. And an inescapable like for other such.

Halsey has probably played the game at some low level. He’s not refereeing because he likes to be berated with such virility or he likes the way those in-ear monitors feel around his lobes. He likes and probably loves football.

Fleming backed his view up by saying “I couldn’t go referee a game of rugby”. Well no, Craig. That would be the equivalent of me saying, I can speak English so I’m going to go and teach Cantonese to a Ring-Tailed Lemur. I don’t speak Cantonese. Or Madagascan. And you, Craig, don’t have an total knowledge of rugby or been involved in hours upon hours of rugby unlike the referees have of and in football.

I make mistakes just as much Ruddy does as much as Halsey and co. do as much as Fleming does and as much as you do. We just have so much riding on his job and so much spotlight on his.

It isn’t easy, labeling him as not being good enough to do his job because he has no experience of a different job is ludicrous.

The Gap’s Not in Goal

We’ve got a history of throwing goalkeepers off the production line but we’re in a bit of a quandary at the minute.

Sir Paul has today said he has “no fears” about putting in the y-less-one so that’s not a problem. His talent and ability has been obvious for a few years now, he’s been a mainstay on the youth international scene for a while too, culminating in a session on the bench for the Under 21’s.

All this despite only having played a handful of senior games.

Whilst most of us are happy to have him between the sticks at home to the Baggies, a bigger problem could be who’s in the gloves on the bench. We’re Norwich, the unlikely unfortunate events happen to us; if we were to encounter an injury to a goalkeeper it will happen when we don’t have one on the bench. And if we’re to keep up our penalty record this season, Rudd can’t be the one give it away.

Not now Cody’s gone.

Our other goalkeeping prospect is away on loan. Big Bryan’s Big Son has been pinched an’all.

If you’ve got some gloves, bring along Sunday, eh?

Undeniably, it’s a big chance for the y-less-one. Ruddy- however well we like to think he’s doing- has a knack of undermining himself with little errors. Little errors with big consequences, as they always are for goalkeepers.

A good performance and he could give himself the chance to really begin to fulfil his potential.

Split Loyalties?

The Chatham Welshman

International weekends. Who needs ‘em. From the looks of Twitter, more were watching Wales than England round our parts.

Club over country an’all that.

I was watching Spain v Chile because of some nasty Australian man. But anyway, the ‘Welsh’ of our squad was a stronger pull than the best English players in the land. Odd that, no?

Does this mean come Tuesday a one-nil win for Wales after Morison nets would be welcomed? Somehow I doubt it, but a 2-1 England win with Morison scoring? Now that would go down well.

If we had an English international, things would be different no doubt. Then again, we do have an English international. Actually, we have three in Crofts, Morison and RMart.

Say Croft and Morison both play Tuesday night; it must be an odd feeling. Both Londoners, they must have grown up watching England in (and not make it to) major tournaments, and now they’ll be playing in the same ground, on the same pitch as the team they would have dreamed of playing for as kids.

An odd scenario, and not one that has an obvious comparison.

It’s not like leaving your boyhood club, it’s bigger than that. Much bigger. But if you were never going to make it for your home country- and we aren’t, no matter what we tell ourselves- but another asked you to play, few would easily say no.

The chance is too big to turn down, and they’ve got their grandmothers to thank for being handed it.

As long as they come back without any niggles or strains, they can do their worst. Which may well end up being the best for us.

Stick or Twist?

A Youthful Adam drury

With the transfer window on its last legs, our hands could be forced back into it by the flurry of injuries in our back line.

But if we don’t we just might get by. Our hands may even be tied to do just that since QPR and Man City appear to be bulk-buying. It’s becoming a bit Dale Winton, 2 days to get as much in your trolley as you can.

If we don’t, our options are scarce, but still there. The aging Drury has played centre-back as and when required and the same goes for Russell Martin.

But, given how many midfielders we find ourselves with, two holding midfielders may just do the job until we’re back up to strength. Johnson putting his weight about and handing the ball to a deep-sitting Fox would be an option I would consider if I was in Sir Paul’s shoes.

Not that Fox is Lambert’s flavour of the week given he was one of the “unfortunates” who faced Franchise FC. But he’s straight into my team week-in week-out.

Then again, maybe we’d sit even deeper than we used to, but three at the back means we’d have many more out-balls. Two sitting deep, two wide men and Patches nestled in behind the top two. But then we’re creating space in the centre of the park, something we can’t afford to do at this level.

Luckily for us, Sir Paul is the man with the white board. Difficult as it is to say given the enormity of what he’s already done, it could be his biggest few days at our Fine Club. Despite how simple as it sounds, he’ll be earning his keep by deciding to stick or twist.

I’m just glad it’s him and not me.

Pressure, Not Like We Know It

Losing 0-4 to Franchise FC has made me realise something. I would hate to be a footballer. Not only because I have an aversion to running due to chronic laziness (Jan Molby was more mobile than I on the football pitch), but the pressure on performing is inestimable.

If/when I have a bad day at the office, not too many people notice. But stick on a yellow shirt and you’ve drawn an end to the world with every misplaced pass. The pressure we pin to these players is absurd, but it’s impossible to stop.

We place so much pressure on them to do what is basically their job that it is a feeling we will never experience or comprehend. Bad days in their job can be impossible to recover from. Unlike us. We don’t have to suffer the wrath of thousands upon thousands, even if in the grand scheme of things the error, bad performance, lapse, off-the-cuff comment is nothing more than a momentary blip.

Granted, they’re compensated handsomely.

Working in the press-room must be just as tough, but they’re lacking the adequate compensation. They are nothing more than a PR company with frills on, but they have the same eagle-eyes on them, every move dissected.

They’re looking after their brand, what’s best for them goes and obviously, their feathers are ruffled. But there has to be more to their latest statement than meets the eye, more than simply the fact that the ‘goalposts were moved’ around the same time of Dion’s blooper.

Yet on the face of it, it’s a lovers tiff. Saying sorry and explaining will get them off the sofa and back into the bed.

But McNally’s shrewd, there must be an ulterior motive, he has shown himself to be pretty adept at doing what’s right for our football club. He’s got my backing.

Blind faith? Who knows. Too much credit? Not sure.

I do know not to believe what I read in the press.

Long Road to Vallecano

I think we love players too easily, too quickly.

Pacheco is supposedly set to join the mighty Rayo Vallecano. Which, supposedly, is closer to Liverpool than Coventry. Cue cries of derision, “Lambert’s first big mistake” was even heard amongst the baying crowd.

Wait. What? His big mistake? Take a little step back and look at that. Pacheco destroyed Scunthorpe on a day when a stiff breeze would have beaten them 2-0. At least. Then he faded away to the bench, showing glimpses of brilliance without any real consistency.

Don’t get me wrong, he would be a brilliant investment. But would also risk stagnating other players we have actually bought. And may even stutter from bench to reserves in an already-top heavy squad.

Much the same as Lansbury would. Another who started in superb fashion in the Championship only to end up tapping on the door of the starting line-up. He failed to properly break through it, admittedly he drifted in and out and made an impact. But now, after we’ve strengthened in the midfield, he would be further back from the door.

Again, as an investment he would be a good signing. Add depth of course. But we’re a big (ish) squad already, he’s not content to sit on the bench at Arsenal, so why would he here?

Sitting on Arsenal’s bench is more appealing than our new Lotus seats.

Canaries Embroiled

This Fernandes chatter needs a little bit of clearing up. He-who-bought-a-hefty-ol’stake in QPR couldn’t be further from this Lotus- Norwich link up. You may well be confused by that if F1 is far from your sporting radar, indeed you may be if you sit down on Sunday every week.

We’re now linked with Lotus Group (created, you may remember when Proton bought Lotus Cars and found their way onto our shirts). The Group make the road cars andsponsor the Renault team in F1. The black and gold Lotus, if you will.

Effectively, Lotus is to Renault F1 the same as Vodafone is to McLaren. Granted, they may develop into something more but as of yet, they do not. The green F1 cars are Tony-now-at-QPR Fernandes’ creation, albeit formerly connected to Lotus Cars by nothing more than the rights to a name.

So they were linked, but a costly, drawn-out trip to the courts severed that. Bitterly. Understandably, relationships have soured, and quickly. Then came the divorce and quick remarriage to other partners.

Lotus. the QPR kind. Not the City kind.

And so followed the oneupmanship we’ve now become embroiled in. Fernandes bought the iconic sports car manufacturer Caterham, a make who bought the rights to a Lotus cars design (The black and gold Lotus) way back when, adding to the growing web. Today’s little announcement appears to be Danny Bahar and gold and black Lotus’ retort.

You may remember the rumours of interest in Our Fine Club from Fernandes (green Lotus) last year. This bred from little more than Jake Humphrey and Mike Gascoyne being City fans and Fernandes coming to a game. And now black and gold Lotus have swept in, buffering us from them.

What happens next is anyone’s guess, but we’re now involved. Our shirt needs a sponsor next year, and Fernandes has got a fairly large airline that’s expanding in AirAsia.

Is that a coup too far? Or are we simply going to have Lotus and Proton branded on our fronts?

Premier Predictor

After looking into my crystal ball (well, my Racing Post pullout preview), I have drawn some conclusions on what will transpire in the forthcoming Premier League season. A season, I hope, that maintains last season’s intrigue but sees a significant upgrade in playing quality, so that the league can get close to the moniker of being ‘the best league in the world’.

In terms of the title, Manchester United look well positioned for a fifth title in six seasons. They will no doubt face a substantial challenge from their local rivals Manchester City who man-for-man look more than United’s equal, but they are not comparable to the red half of Manchester when it comes to fostering a team spirit, which in turn has helped to develop United’s legendary winning mentality, evident in their comeback triumph in last weekends Community Shield.

Other factors in the champions favour include excellent defensive cover for the perennially crocked Rio Ferdinand, and the likelihood of Wayne Rooney returning to optimum form.

So, United for me, but Manchester City to come a relatively close second, hampered by Roberto Mancini’s innate negativity.

The two Manchester juggernauts will be joined in the Champions League berths by traditional title challengers Chelsea and Arsenal.

@JamieBrannon10 thinks we're seeing that grin again this year

If new Chelsea manager Andre Villas-Boas had invested heavily and wisely this summer then a case could have been made for a championship success. However, Abramovich is seemingly reluctant to indulge in an intense spending spree to regenerate an ageing squad, so a mediocre campaign beckons unless cup success can add some gloss.

I have written Arsenal off many times before when it comes to finishing outside the top four, but Arsene Wenger keeps confounding me, so I refuse to suggest anything less than fourth, despite his stubbornness or blindness to address areas of weakness that have held them back since their last trophy six years ago.

They need a commanding centre-back and a destructive midfielder in the mould of Patrick Viera.

Although the impending sales of Cesc Fabregas and Samir Nasri for a combined fee of close to £60m should free up funds to iron out these deficiencies.

Knowing Wenger though, he will recruit a diminutive ball-playing midfielder, and then claim he is looking to the future!

As for relegation, you are foolish to predict all three promoted clubs going down as this has only happened once in Premier League history.  However, my hunch is that two will perish.

Firstly, Norwich City will gain admirers for their aesthetically pleasing football but ultimately lack the Premier League class and experience to ensure a second season. This is evident in their uninspiring transfer dealings which have seen them capture players who never set the Championship alight never mind the top flight.

Secondly, despite the mega-rich ownership QPR look ripe for an immediate return to the second tier, principally because their owners have not backed manager Neil Warnock with sufficient to make a serious indent in the league. A farce of season may beckon, if the owners start interfering with Warnock’s stewardship.

Jay Bothroyd has joined; however, his capture doesn’t alter my view that a distinct lack of firepower will be their Achilles heel.

Joining two of the new boys will be Wigan Athletic who have been punching above their weight at this level longer than many anticipated. Reality will bite this season, which is a pity, as Roberto Martinez’s decision to stay as manager was an admirable gesture of loyalty given his undoubted potential to go far in his career. For me even if Hugo Rodallega is retained they will fall short in the goalscoring department and generally their squad looks weaker than principal relegation rivals.

Those rivals will include Blackburn Rovers, who have new ownership but an inexperienced manager, although with a solid platform at the back to build a survival foundation.

Bolton Wanders look vulnerable after the sale of Johan Elmander, and Daniel Sturridge has returned to parent club Chelsea after last season’s loan.

They possess just enough solidity and variety in their play to maintain top flight status.

Cases could be made for several others, but those sides generally have the necessary fire power to do nothing more than flirt with relegation and avoid the visceral agony of relegation.

All that’s left to say is to advise you to visit your nearest bookmaker and enjoy all the excitement and acute disappointment that ante-post betting brings when by December you realise your betting dreams have been ripped right open at the seams. Don’t panic though, as you can reload your betting arsenal by reading the Racing Post halfway supplement with new recommendations, out just before Christmas.

That’s Enough

Another day, another pointless rumour about our very own Grant Holt. The more reasoned of us shrug it off as mere hearsay and move swiftly on. Others get wrapped up in it and others offer ‘witty’ retorts reeking of “Newcastle? Sm-ewcastle more like. Heh” and the face-palming ilk.

But the thought of Holt leaving isn’t easily conceived, not because of how good he is for us with the captain’s armband wrapped round his bicep, but how he would struggle to replicate what he’s done here elsewhere.

He’s a not so much a big fish at Carrow Road but certainly the most hard-working and influential fish in a pond in which he feels right at home. Technically gifted wouldn’t necessarily spring to mind. Zlatan he aint. But he’ll bring the ball down and give every drop to get it back if it bounces away. He even takes a couple of chances per goal.

But sell him? Swap him? Not a chance.

He’s one of those of players that you can visibly see straining every sinew for 90 full-on minutes which goes a long way to winning fans over. Scoring a hattrick down the road goes a bit further. Laughing whilst doing it goes further still.

But were he to leave he would never experience this sort of adulation again. He came with little pressure, whereas move for £4million+ after 50 goals in two seasons and the pressure’s mounted. Next season he could have a quiet seaon with the boot but his presence will still be still be felt and acknowledged by the Carra faithful. Move, and he could run as much <i>bionically</i> possible but if he fails to live up to the goal expectancy it wouldn’t matter a jot.

Thankfully, no matter how many rumours are inflated to fill a line or two, he’ll be in yellow come Saturday. And still will be this time next season.